Team players, cliche slayers,
Have you heard about and/or entered the 22nd Annual Jeffrey E. Smith Editor’s Prize Contest? Because if you haven’t you should send an entry in, especially in our three categories– Fiction, Essay, and Poetry.
If you’re still not convinced, here’s some reasons why:
1. The prize is a mad amount of money, yo.
2. Here is a contest that will never, ever (depending on next year’s budget) sell your information to a multinational corporation that is bent upon destroying your will to live, your sense of individuality, and your ability to make friends and influence people.
3. If enough of you enter the contest, Managing Editor Michael Nye has promised the interns a pizza party.
4. We really like to read all the interesting, awesome things that you send us. We also like that you give us $20 for the pleasure of reading your work. Then we get really sad because we remember how messed up the literary economy is. But then we read some more of your work and we get happy again, so it’s alright.
5. If you don’t enter our contest, komodo dragons will stage a coup and seize control of Indonesia. Indonesia is the 4th most populous country in the world and deserves better than a totalitarian, civil-rights-abusing, komodo-dragon-propelled political system.
6. Sometimes the winners of the Editor’s Prize Contest have published several things in many, many wonderful journals and magazines. And sometimes it is their first publication. Either way, it doesn’t matter. All that matters is the quality of your writing. We promise you that.
7. If you enter the Editor’s Prize Contest, you’ll get a one-year subscription to The Missouri Reviewin either print or digital form. (Psst. The digital form is mad cool because you also get to experience the work of our awesome audio team and they make things real spiffy.)
8. If you don’t enter the Contest I will devote the rest of the semester to making this a blog solely about “Writer Style”, a fashion-advice site dedicated to snarky remarks regarding famous writers’ dress senses. (sample criticisms: “nice smock, Anne Bradstreet” or “What’s with the overalls, Ernest?” or “why is there so much spaghetti in your books about Japan, Haruki Murakami? Don’t you know how awesome all Japanese food already is?” etc.)
9. These two Contest Editors will be so happy if you enter:
10. 2012 marks the end of the world. You don’t want the world ending when your story/poem/essay is still in the bottom drawer of the desk. You want the world to end with Mike Petrik reading your work, wondering if it’s worth $5000, and deciding at the last minute (owing to the rapidly approaching apocalypse) that, well, why not, you might as well be declared winner. What difference does it make anyway, especially when compared to the doom of our entire universe? But it does. To you. You get to spend eternity knowing you were, no matter how briefly, the winner of the 2012 Jeffrey E. Smith Editor’s Prize. I’m just saying.
11. mad money, yo.